“I know his threats could be real.” Sorina’s story of digital violence

You can’t turn off your phone, you can’t stop the notifications. Your reality becomes a lie created by the abuser—one that everyone else eventually comes to believe. You find yourself on ground you cannot control at all. More and more women are facing this form of violence, and more and more need to know how to protect themselves from it.

He seemed like a good person

Sorina* had been in a violent marriage that ended in divorce. She was left caring for a young daughter. She went abroad, where she worked at a guesthouse. There, she met Gabriel*—a man who seemed decent and was well regarded by their coworkers.

Before long, they became a couple and decided to move to Sorina’s home village. There, Gabriel met Sorina’s family. On the other hand, Sorina knew very little about him or his family. She didn’t ask many questions, and he didn’t share much. Even so, things seemed to work.

Two more children were born into the family, and Sorina was expecting a third. Gabriel became authoritarian. He expected everyone to follow his rules and used threats to enforce them.

One day, he came home, saw Sorina bathing, and took a photo of her. “He told me that if we separated, he would create a Facebook account and post that photo. That’s what kept me in the relationship.”

Control over every move

Gabriel worked abroad periodically, but to stay informed about what was happening at home, he installed surveillance cameras. This allowed him to hold Sorina accountable for every action: “Why did you talk to the neighbor?” “Why is the child out on the road?” “Why did that person come here?” and so on.

Guests were not welcome in the house, and control turned into threats of life and death.

“He threatened to open a gas cylinder and lock me and the girls inside the house,” the woman says.

Sorina was utterly terrified. She knew the danger was real. Gabriel did not spare her from beatings, not even during pregnancy.

After the last threat, Sorina decided she wanted to separate. The man became enraged, returned home, and angrily destroyed property in the house.

Fake accounts and sexually explicit posts

After some time, he left again, and from a distance began creating fake Facebook accounts using Sorina’s identity. The profiles featured what appeared to be her ordinary photos from the family archive—images the woman did not want made public. Moreover, these photos were accompanied by inappropriate comments: “I’m alone with three children and looking for a man for relationships—call me anytime,” with her contact details openly displayed.

More and more accounts appeared, each carrying messages implying Sorina’s availability in search of sexual partners. The posts reached both Sorina’s list of friends and local community groups. As a result, the woman was approached by suspicious men, and the messages seemed never to stop.

Defamation as part of everyday life

Gabriel’s reaction to Sorina’s pleas to stop was vengeful and violent. In private messages, the woman received hatred and an inexplicable determination to continue.

“I created the messages for you—now deal with it. I’ll post your phone number so people will call and know you’re a bitch.”

Sorina says that at the beginning, when the posts first appeared, she was deeply affected and cried constantly. Now she has grown accustomed to the threats and defamation being part of her life.

Still, when she talks about what happened, she feels a lump in her throat and at times struggles to breathe. In a world where she is constantly defamed, she cannot feel safe alongside her children.

“I know his threats could be real. I don’t know what lies behind them.”

What you can do if you are a victim of digital violence:

• Document everything: save screenshots, links, messages, and comments. Every detail can matter, especially if you report the case to authorities or a platform.
• Report abusive content to the platform where it appears.
• Block and report the user.
• If the abuse involves real threats, deepfakes, or consequences for your professional or personal life, contact the authorities.
• Click the “GET HELP” button on www.eviolenta.md — the first national information resource dedicated to preventing digital violence and supporting women and girls online. Here you can receive immediate, free, and confidential help. You can write in the online counseling chat, where professional counselors provide support and information in safety and confidentiality.
• You can also call the Women and Girls’ Trust Line: 0 8008 8008

*Name has been changed to protect identity.

The online service www.eviolenta.md was developed through the joint efforts of the International Center “La Strada” and the United Nations Population Fund (UNFPA) in Moldova, under the aegis of the National Agency for Preventing and Combating Violence against Women and Domestic Violence (ANPCV) and the Ministry of Labor and Social Protection, with financial support from the Government of the United Kingdom.